Random Silly Quotes

To save you refreshing the page many times to get different amusing quotes in small text in the footer of each page, this "quotes" page will present you with twenty quotes each time you load the page.

"Smile, it makes people wonder what the hell you're up to."

Math and Alcohol don't mix.... Don't drink and derive!

If in doubt, mumble.

And God said: Let there be vodka! And He saw that it was good. Then God said: Let there be light! And then He said: Whoa - too much light.

"What's another word for thesaurus?"

You're too drunk when... Every night you're beginning to find your roommate's cat more and more attractive.

Curiosity? Nah. I got THAT cat with a lawnmower. (From Lilith)

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. - Frank Sinatra

Beer - So much more than just a breakfast drink.

"Bother!" said Pooh, as he sold Eeyore to the glue factory.

If it were truly the thought that counted, more women would be pregnant.

I love the "swooshing" sound deadlines make as they go by.

"You only live once, so live under as many false names as possible."

How do I set my laser printer on stun?

It's hard to believe you out-swam a million other sperm.

What has four legs and an arm? A happy pitbull.

"DOS=HIGH" ... this explains a lot.

And God said: Let there be vodka! And He saw that it was good. Then God said: Let there be light! And then He said: Whoa - too much light.

Don't steal, the government doesn't like the competition

Go the extra mile. It makes your boss look like a slacker.